Grace under pressure...

Sometimes there are bumps in the road of life.  No one is immune to them, but it is how one reacts to them that makes all the difference. 

I recently have been privy to glimpsing the reactions of a couple to some fairly routine difficulties they are experiencing in selling a home.  Each setback sends them into whirling maelstroms of upset, tears, gloom and doom.  The term grace under pressure does not apply to them.  Their reactions whip everyone around them into a bit of  frenzy and despair. It is miserable.

I had an appointment in Camden after work today.  Rachel offered to drive me, and we left in time to do a bit of shopping first.  As we were motoring through Rockland her little car hit a sunken manhole cover, hard.  We didn't think too much about it, popped into our favorite jewelry store, and then headed off to my appointment.  Rachel's little car was making a funny noise, and she pulled over to the side of the road, thinking a chunk of ice was in her wheel well.  That would have been nice.  Instead she found...

a very, very flat tire.  "Oh heck," she said. Then she got into the car, drove it carefully into a parking lot right across from where we stopped, and tried to get her spare out of her hatchback.  The hatch door was jammed and wouldn't open, so the spare was unreachable. She tried to climb over the back seat to get it, but that didn't work.  Meanwhile, I didn't want to miss my appointment, so called, explained my plight and asked if I could come a little late.  When I got the OK on that plan, I called a cab and was off.  I also called my husband to see if he could leave work a little early and come pick me up when I was done.  After all our years together, I knew exactly what his reaction would be.  He would be kind and anxious to help.  I was not dissapointed.

Rachel called her brand new husband at work. He left early to rescue her, bringing hot chocolate and a AAA membership with him.  And all of this has me thinking, about bumps in the road, flat tires, displaced plans.  For some couples, the entire episode could have ended in a fight.  "Why didn't you pay attention? What did you hit the pot hole for? Those are brand new tires, we can't afford to replace one." My husband could have complained, "I can't leave work early and come all the way there!" I can imagine any number of scenarios where a bump in the road could end up in all manner of  unpleasantness.  But that didn't happen.  Chris picked me up, offered to buy me dinner, then brought me home. Evans met Rachel and stayed with her, waiting and waiting for AAA. They made an event of it, grabbing a bite to eat while they waited.  And it wasn't fun, but no one got upset or ugly. And both Rachel and I had spouses we could depend on to help us when we needed them.  My elderly aunt used to tell me, "You have a true help mate in Chris." It delights me to see that my daughter has a true help mate in Evans.

Bumps and grace.  The former are inevitable. The latter make life so much sweeter.