And tonights project...

Decorating wreathes for gifts. There is one with a snowflake motif, one with vintage Santa figures, and one with angel dogs for a dog-rescuing friend. Tomorrow they get packed up and sent off. This was BIG FUN! I will be sending a little bit of Maine to three different states.

Party anxiety...

From my childhood until my late 20's I was very, VERY shy. Example: I was scared to go to restaurants, because I was afraid to talk to the waitstaff. Times have changed. At 50 I am a confident person. I am a public speaker, I deal with customers all day every day. I am just FINE. Fine, that is, until I get invited to a party where there will be strangers. That is an invitation to anxiety.



My husband sweetly asked me to join him at the Christmas gathering of a volunteer organization he belongs to. I, of course, agreed. And then I fretted and worried and stewed. Making conversation with strangers? AWKWARD. The party was at a local restaurant. There was to be an hour of "cocktails" followed by supper. Yet, there was no room to really mix and mingle and chat. I pushed out of my comfort level, made eye contact, shook hands, asked questions and chatted. All of this in cramped close quarters. I played the role, and soon found myself having (gasp!) fun. (Interesting aside: I was chatting with a lovely young mom. She told me that she, her husband and 11 year old son had just moved here this past summer. I asked her if they were settling in well. She said they were, then added, "My son just loves playing outside!" Upon hearing this I thought, "They must have moved from a city where the child could not play out of doors." She continued, "At home he couldn't go out much, what with the weather and the grizzlies." GRIZZLIES? "Where did you live?" I asked. "Kodiak." Bears? There is a parenting issue I had never encountered!!!)



I learned a new trick that I am going to remember. When at a gathering like this, I did (and will do in the future) this: find a very chatty person and sit with THEM. That very chatty person will engage others and ensure that conversation flows. When I am near a chatty person I can follow their lead and help the give and take to flow.



As a formerly shy person, I continue to learn coping tricks. This is a good one, so I share with my readers who might have similar "party anxiety."

Small things...

Sometimes I have a bad day. A day in which I feel overwhelmed, irritated and just plain old unhappy. OK, I'll admit it. I get crabby sometimes. The things that normally bring me joy lose their focus and their luster. The big picture is hazy with my discontent.

My remedy? I make myself focus on the small things, and be thankful. I take time as I wake to be grateful for the soft, warm bed, the snoring dogs, the good man beside me. I am mindful to be thankful for the sun rising, the hot shower, the simple clothes on my body. And I find, that as I am thankful for the "small" things (such as the lacy growth of ornamental grass, the smell of the morning air, my truck starting...) the big things come into focus, too. And before I know it the day and my concentration on all its small things sharpen my view and leave me feeling contented instead of crabby. The term "gratitude is an attitude" rings true to me.

There will be other bad days, but hopefully my method of remembering to be thankful for the wee puzzle pieces that make up my life will help guide me back on track. Small things... so many of them to be grateful for.

Piling loveliness...

The seasons first accumulating snow is here. The wind is rattling the old casement windows and sending spiraling funnels of white off the garage roof.

The snow makes the wild birds seem grateful for the seed and suet in the feeders.

The chickens are not amused. They refuse to go out in the snow, and stare balefully out the door when I check on them. They are snug and dry in their coop, but bored, I imagine, and seemingly pouty.

The dogs are gleeful with the change in venue. There is much bouncing and leaping and joy on swift legs. (Yes, the toy poodle is a very strange color. A dye job gone horribly wrong!)

Even Lilly, who will be 13 in February, gets in on the fun the airborne excitement.

After our frolic I toss a log on the fire, fix a cup of tea and we all pile up on the sofa. I work on writing assignments while the dogs snooze. Outside the loveliness continues to pile up.

Sweet day...

So, I flew away, southward and home...

This sign always gives me a little thrill. It means I am almost there.

There where my "hideously unattractive" nieces are. There where the house I grew up in still welcomes me, where friends and family gather. Sister Donna and I visited the cemetary as the sun was setting to pay our respects to our parents, grandparents, aunts, uncles and others.

Back at the house we immersed ourselves in frosting and sugar and candy and the conversation flowed like syrup.

All the while sister Deb cooked for us, a feast of steak, mashed sweet potatoes, roasted vegetables and the most amazing salad made from baby spinach, fresh berries and candied pecans. The house was warm and cozy and welcoming and I was so happy to be there.

Every corner of my sisters home was filled with loveliness and light. We had such a sweet visit. I brought home a sticky ginger bread house and a pocket full of memories.

What home looked like...

I am going "home" today. This is the house I grew up in... built by my father. The family story was that he added a room every time my mom got pregnant. Since they had 5 kids, the house has a bit of sprawl to it! Now my sister and her family live here, in the house in the trees. And I get to visit. Today we will gather there and make ginger bread houses. We will celebrate niece Emily's birthday and we will laugh and talk. The house looks quite a bit different than it did when I was growing up, but I treasure the fact that I can still go there and be embraced by the memories of family history. I can sit on the hearth knowing that the bricks there were laid by my sweet father's capable hands. I know he would love to see us all there. The house feels like a hug from my parents. I am so lucky.

The halls...

They are decked...
One of my favorite "decorations" are these figures that our daughter made in high school. An angel, Mary and baby Jesus. Made from fabric and wire with great care.

I got a little silly with the lights... but I rather like how they illuminate this corner of the dining room.

Our tree is JUST right size. For me. Husband and child find it disappointingly small.

This is the first thing one sees when entering our home. I change it with the seasons. Rachel helped me decorate it for Christmas, and I think we did a fine job.